I attended Vassar College, once one of the “Seven Sisters” women only colleges. Vassar became coed in 1969. Acceptance as a college for men wasn’t gaining traction when I applied in 1976. The Director of Admissions created a pamphlet posing a simple question. Vassar for men? Sex Toys for men is where Vassar was thirty years ago. Women have used rabbit vibrators, clitoral stimulators and g-spot vibrators for years, some women ONLY orgasm with a trusted sex toy.
Until you reach my age, north side of fifty, men usually orgasm without much fanfare or effort. Some need help delaying their orgasm (another article for another time). The fact most men CAN orgasm without using sex toys begs the question why should men be left out? Are sex toys for men?
Yes is the unequivocal answer in increasing numbers. Contrary to common misconception men are not made of old shoe leather. Men are just as sensitive to vibration’s pleasures as women. Gillette understands vibration’s benefits. I couldn’t live without my Fusion four-blade “shaving system” with vibration. Does anyone else think four blades on a cartridge is it? Any more blades and my razor is going to beep like a truck backing up when I shave around my large nose. If razors benefit from vibration won’t male sexual pleasure?
We received a nice email from a slightly irate male customer the other day. “What about the men,” was his simple question, Men, in matters sexual, may be overlooked. Men SEEM less complicated. Smart women know men’s sexuality, what turns a man on, can be as complicated as quantum physics. Let’s leave the quantum to scientists and ask ourselves some useful questions about sex toys for men.
Male Anatomy
Men and women share common erogenous zones including nipples, anus and perineum. One day soon I have to write a thousand words on the perineum because this remarkable area of nerve endings between a man’s testicles and anus is a POWERFUL area. Most of the perineum’s life is spent is dark sweaty ignobility. Trapped inside underwear and pants the ignored perineum waits for rare chances to come out and PLAY. Sexually sophisticated women turn their g-spot vibrators lose on their lover’s perineum. Do this one time and tell me his reaction. If his orgasm is not among the most powerful he has ever had I need to write another article on how to stimulate a man’s perineum (lol).
In human anatomy, the perineum is generally defined as the surface region in both males and females between the pubic symphysis and the coccyx.
Ref: Wikipedia
Jack Hammer is not a good phrase in conjunction with perineum. Starting slow is good better sex advice in general. Staring slowly and carefully with your first perineum stimulation is a must. Molded g-spot vibrators including Lucid Dreams #14, G Gasm and Natural Contours Liberte and Butterfly Kiss Gspot vibrator will fit his perineum like a glove. Tease with slight pressure until he insists on more. Highly sensitive areas need TLC. Go slow and steady and follow his clues and lead. Follow the leader works here and is more excellent good “better sex” advice.
Testicles require extra TLC. Every man knows how it feels to get hit there. How to describe this uniquely male pain to women? Imagine a prize fighter hit you in the stomach as hard as possible. Even that description pales. Testicles can be gently stimulated with vibrators. The operative word is gently and let’s throw in another “carefully” just for good measure.
Anal Stimulation
Anal sex is the new black. It is all the rage. We joking say, “Anal Sex is the new Oral Sex.” Some get grossed out due to the elementary nature of anal cavities. Here is a mind experiment to help you think of your anus differently. How much time a day is your anus employed for its biological purpose? When you realize 99% of the time your anus is just hanging out with your perineum waiting to be included, waiting to play, gross out is less likely.
Cleanliness is next to Godliness, so use an anal douche, take a shower or avoid anal sex anywhere near the 1% of time you use your ass for its other function. Change your mind, do some experimentation and anal stimulation will become part of your sex play. We know this because if the perineum is a bundle of nerve endings your anus is a galaxy of pleasure points.
Prostate Stimulation – The Male “G-Spot”
If food is the secret to his heart then prostate stimulation may hold the key to his orgasm. I had a physical the other day. I suffered from BPH (Benign Prostatic Hyperplasia) in my thirties. BPH is when your prostate swells up to beach ball dimensions making normal living impossible. You can’t sleep waking up every two hours to pee. You can’t have sex since the idea of sex makes the beach ball grow. You can’t drink caffeine or eat spicy food without enraging the monster, the monster living in your ass. Whoever coined the term, “Pain in the ass,” suffered from BPH.
I bring up painful memories to help you stave off similar fate. Regular prostate stimulation with a finger, an Anerous dildo or a vibrator from Rocks Off may just help your prostate NOT become a monster. I had to have a TURP (trans urethral resection of the prostate). This is when doctors (or aliens I am not sure) travel up the penis with LARGE instruments to shave an overgrown beach ball prostate. AVOID THIS AT ALL COSTS. If I could have avoided such poor prostate health by sticking something, anything, up the old bum you have to know I would have done it in a heart beat. Medieval is an accurate description for this operation painful is another.
Prostate stimulation during sex may produce powerful orgasms. You have toyou’re your annual check up out of your mind. Doctors have probably saved my life more than once, but I’ve yet to meet one who can check a prostate without humiliation and pain. Men, like elephants, have long memories. We tend to group stimuli into “good = do again” and “bad = avoid on pain of death”. Prostate stimulation may be in the “bad” and only once a year by a doctor category for many men. If you can’t imagine anal or prostate stimulation start slow and by yourself; soap up a finger in the shower and do a little anal exploration. If you are like most men your reaction will be, “Wow, something interesting here”. There is a long way from fear of anal stimulation to using Rocks Off Rude Boy (even the small one). You may NOT like anal stimulation. Anal stimulation is a “no harm, no foul” situation. Hey, you can always use another beach ball right?
Aneros Prostate Stimulators
Rocks Off Anal Vibrators
There are other things you can do for prostate health besides direct stimulation. You’ve heard these other ideas before: eat right, don’t drink to excess, don’t smoke and watch your numbers (weight, cholesterol). I am not a doctor. I am just an occasional lab rat. I hate those commercials who advise you to, “Ask your doctor.” Right, I wait an hour to get ten minutes and I am going to fill up that time talking about drugs on saw on TV. I hate giving cliché advice, but, take it from one who knows how important a prostate can be, if you are over 40 TALK to your doctor about your prostate health. Start by asking these questions:
- What is my PSA (prostate specific antigen predicts if you have the Big C or not).
Ask this question and I guarantee you will have a PSA test on that visit.
- Get your doctor’s thoughts on prostate stimulation during sex. Ask if the research they read supports a lower cancer risk from stimulation.
3. Ask them what they suggest to promote prostate health. If they come back with drinking, weight and smoking you owe me a buck (lol).
Other Vibrators For Men
I work on computers. Believe me “working on computers” sounds much more glamorous than it really is. All day every day I type while staring at a monitor. I’ve found some of our “personal massagers” can give relaxing massages after long hard days. I use Lucid Dreams 14 for neck and shoulder massage. I like Lucid 14’s iPod-like wheel control. It is easy to modify speed and the same molded head that fits perineum so well also feels great at the top or bottom of your spine.
I only SOUND like a metrasexual. I grew up playing sports. Late in life (college) I began using my head for something other than hitting people and got to like it. All those year of hitting people are playing out on knees, shoulders and hips now. My knees would laugh if I put Lucid 14 on them. Knees require more power. I use an Hitachi wand behind my knees and that usually means I can walk for another day (maybe). Our sister company Natural Contours makes a pretty fair massager called Natural Contours Ideal. They also created some cool alien looking attachments for the Ideal that also fit the Hitachi. Attachments are to reach g-spots and other interior locations. I haven’t used Ideal attachments for massage yet.
Cock Rings
A couple of years ago we witnessed the start of a Cock Ring Revolution. I thought this was a good sign. Men get a bad rap. One common (wrong) perception is men are sexually selfish. We get ours and if she gets hers who cares. Not true, men are like dogs (in many, many ways). We live for our pack and for treats. We learn FAST what behaviors get treats. One big treat, one could call it peace on earth it is so big, is helping a partner’s orgasm. I am not suggesting men are responsive for a woman’s orgasm. The world is complicated enough. We are only ever truly responsible for our own orgasm, but lending a helping hand, or just paying attention, produces treats.
Cock rings are an important group of vibrators for men AND for women. Cock rings stimulate his penis and her clitoris simultaneously. I feel like that guy on that infomercial, “it sells itself.” Cock rings are code for, “I care about you, and I will share my penis vibrations with your clitoris.” Please promise you will never actually SAY such a goofy thing. You are free to think it subliminally.
Cock rings have three really important benefits. Vibrations to a man’s penis feels great. Helping tighten up the base of a man’s penis can be helpful when you fall on the north side of fifty. Getting old is not for wimps. The drawstring, there isn’t an actual drawstring but it is a helpful analogy, at the base of your penis can relax as you age. Cock rings help keep blood in your penis helping to create a stiffer stiffy. AND you stimulate her clitoris with a teasing vibration that comes and goes. This cock ring revolution has legs. Sex toys for men is pretty revolutionary too. Viva La Revolution!
The Daily Martin is © 2009 Martin Smith
Glad to loan content when requested, but please don’t just steal.
Martin’s Personal Blog: http://ScentTriail.blogspot.com
Martin’s LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/martysmith1980vc
Martin’s Email: msmith(at)BetterSex(dot)com
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